Know Your Goddesses

goddesses
Here are the ABCs (and more!) on all of your favorite goddesses!

Between the ten of them, your goddesses are:

- FAMOUS with over 24 million books in print!
- INTELLIGENT with nine bachelor degrees, four masters degrees, and two PhDs!
- SUCCESSFUL, spending over 278 weeks on the USA Today bestsellers list and 27 weeks on the New York Times print list!
- FRUITFUL and have written over 219 books!
- and VICTORIOUS with twelve RITA Awards with 34 nominations, three Bookseller’s Best Awards, seven RT Best Awards, and six RWA Favorite Book of the Year!

YOUR GODDESSES ROCK!

Some facts about your goddesses:

Your goddesses haven’t always been writers. At some time or another, some of them worked in “the real world.” Some of them enjoyed their work, others . . . not so much.

Here’s a list of the jobs your goddesses once had. We capped them to make them appear More Important.

Product Development Engineer, Grocery Check-Out Clerk, Quality Assurance Manager, Customer Service Manager, Database Designer, High School Teacher, Sewer Company Employee, College Professor, Director of Student Activities, Art Dealer, Coordinator for Study Abroad Programs, Assistant Buyer for a major retail chain, Movie Theater Box Office Ticket Seller, Law Firm File Clerk, Optometry College Public Relations Secretary, Secretary to the president of a Mercedes dealership, Technical Writer, Waitress, Photography Studio Manager, Receptionist, Coach, Bookkeeper, Researcher, and Day Care Director.

And your goddesses have worked with every major publisher in New York and Canada including Avon, Ballantine, Bantam, Berkley, Dell, Dorchester, Grand Central, Harlequin/Silhouette, HarperCollins, Kensington, NAL, Pocket, St. Martin’s, and Simon and Schuster!

They’re also well-traveled, having among them visited at least 45 of the 50 states and over 20 countries.

The most difficult thing for your goddesses to write:

The Beginning Chapter–40%
The Middle–30%
Love Scenes–20%
All of it, but I do it anyway–Lori, oops, 10%

Goddess Julia London commented “Writing conflict is easy. I’ve been skewering men for one thing or another all my life.”

Yes, we were shocked by that, too.

Where your goddesses work:

Home Office–70%
Waiting for my kids at soccer practice–10%
Coffee Shop–10%
Patio–10%

What your goddesses wear while composing their masterful books:

Jeans or shorts and a t-shirt–30%
Casual slacks and shirt–10%
Sweats–30%
Nothing–10%
PJs–20%
Taffeta and Tiara–none (though Sabrina admits to the tiara part from time to time)

We think Karen Hawkins answered “nothing” but she won’t admit it and we’re not hiring a P.I. to find out.

What is your goddesses’ favorite beverage to sip whilst writing?
margarita
Coffee–50%
Tea–20%
Diet Dr. Pepper–10%
Water–10 %
Martini Dry with a Double Twist (we think that was Susan Mallery — she’s big on lemons)

Note: Goddesses do not condone drunk driving, writing, or reading, so if you’re drinking vodka right now, please put down the glass and call in a designated reader.

What would your goddesses do for chocolate?

Walk over really hot sand–30%
Walk in hot water–10%
Walk through fire–30% (if the chocolate didn’t melt, of course)
Blech–30%
Yum!
Rachel Gibson answered “blech” but added that she would “kill for a bag of skittles” and Barbara Samuels said “all of the above” which wasn’t an option, but we’re going to let her have it.

Total number of children scattered amongst your fertile and busy goddesses, including stepchildren and wards of state:

19

Susan Mallery wished to count her dogs, but if we allowed that, we would also have to allow Suzanne Enoch to count her “gazillion” guppies, which we felt would skew the number.

Sabrina Jeffries asked to include her husband in “number of children,” but we declined though we concede her point. Sometimes, there’s not a lot of difference.

For those of you seeking an audience with Zeus, your friendly goddesses are not averse to bribery, as long as it comes in one of the following forms:

Food–15%
Jewelry–5%
Clothes–0% (the goddesses don’t trust anyone else’s fashion sense)
Books–10%
Knick-knacks–15% (send all your ugly statues to Barbara Samuel – she collects ‘statues’ though she names them all ‘Rita’, which is SO confusing)
Practical stuff (like an appliance or a manicure set)–15%
Bath goodies–10%
All of the above–30%

All of your romance author goddesses base their heroes on sexy men they’ve seen on TV or, if they’re lucky, in real life. One big screen example is Hugh Jackman. In an effort to understand the depth of admiration a romance author goddess can have for such a man as Hugh Jackman, we asked our goddess authors what they’d do for a kiss from this demi-god.

Jump through hoop of fire–10%
Throw myself from the top of a burning building onto the top of his limo and hope he would notice before the ambulance scraped me off and hauled me away–20% (Suzanne Enoch said this would make an impression. On his car.)
Wrestle his huge hulking body guards to the ground using my high-falutin’ kung fu techniques, regardless of the choke holds and flying meaty elbows I might encounter–20%
Anything he wanted–40%

Madeline added that she would also hurl lightning bolts at any other goddess who tried to steal his attention. Rumor has it there is no honor among goddesses when it comes to Hugh Jackman.

Except, that is, for Julia London (who obviously has not yet experienced the Hugh Jackman Magic) who said, “Hugh who? Give me Colin Firth and we’ll talk.”

The rest of the goddesses politely declined to answer.

For more information on your lovely, successful goddesses, check our their individual websites!